Crazy Nanny at a BBQ...

Crazy Nanny is my 79 year old grandmother. I refer to her as Crazy Nanny or Crazy Grandma to my friends due to the countless stories they’ve heard about her. I call her Nanny to her face. Never grandma…because when I was born, she was only 50 and she deemed the term “Grandma” to be for old ladies. And she wasn’t an old lady and even when she got older, she wouldn’t act like one. So far she’s been true to her word. At 79, she still works, taking care of old people no less, and she also goes to the gym three to four days a week.

I don’t call her crazy to be mean. And she doesn’t actually have any (diagnosed) mental problems. It’s the only way I could think of to describe her lack of regard for other people’s feelings. Here’s how she behaved this past weekend at my aunt and uncles BBQ.

She was actually pretty sociable and well behaved until her altercation with an eight year old boy. It all started when Nanny was walking my one and a half year old cousin around the backyard. And the son of one of my aunt and uncles friends went running by with a water gun and accidentally shot the baby with it. Firstly, as said, it was an accident. Secondly, he barely even got him at all. It was really just a stray splash.

Well, this of course sent Crazy Nanny on the defensive. And as the kid ran by again, she stole the water gun from him. Yanked it right out of his hands. I told you she goes to the gym…she isn’t some frail little old lady.

Now, the kid is pissed and he wants his gun back. So he tries to grab it back from her. And Nanny keeps responding by pulling it away from him. Finally the kid has had enough and he gets a good grip on it. And gives it one hell of a tug. So Nanny tugs back even harder and sends the kid stumbling back a few feet. So what do you think Nanny feels compelled to do at this point…no, she didn’t give him the gun back. She shot him in the face with it. Much to the delight of the baby.

She finally relented and gave the kid back the gun. And promptly told him to take a hike. My aunt and I watched the whole thing go down. And neither one of us could believe it.

That’s my Nanny. Always the picture of maturity.